Five Steps to Gain Power With Your Domestic Staff
Co-authored by Mark Harbeke
You’ve just stepped into a new position, and it looks like this…
The housekeeper is working hard, but…
The house is not nearly as clean as it should be, and to top that off…
You see numerous inefficiencies in how the work could be done better with less effort.
Sound familiar?
And here’s the rub: your employer is not unhappy about the housekeeper’s performance!
Huh?
How do you, as the new estate manager, instruct your housekeeper to do a better job without potentially creating blowback for yourself based on the housekeeper’s pre-existing relationship with the principal?
I helped a client with this sticky situation recently and, in fact, used it as an example in a case study for one of my recent Coffee Talk sessions:
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So, how did I advise my client?
First, I recommended that they worry about the dirty house later, and to refocus their efforts on onboarding themself with the property’s needs and principal’s preferences.
Why are those more important than a clean house?
I personally learned that no matter how many years of experience one has in private service, when stepping into a new role, I provided very little value to my principal until I knew their preferences, personnel, property and problems — and I had less than ZERO POWER until I did. And my staff knew it.
It was a painful lesson.
So, let’s create a plan of attack to build power (and value) in your new role.
Step 1: Learn your principal’s preferences
Their pet peeves, priorities and personal service providers
And while doing so, DON’T say, “In my previous position, I….” The sad truth is that after you’ve been hired, no one cares and, more importantly when it comes to private service, it’s all about this principal’s needs and protecting their privacy. So, if you’re referring to your past experience, your principal will likely think they’ll be your next case study.
Step 2: Complete your new property’s forensics
Prepare a contractor master list (go here to get a sample of this document along with other lists for managing a mansion)
Review and update contractor paperwork
Meet them on-site
Prepare budgets for repairs
Schedule regular maintenance
DON’T allow contractors on the property without valid paperwork (contracts, insurance certificates, license, NDA and a Memorandum of Understanding surrounding your service expectations)
Step 3: Require teamwork
(OK, stop laughing!)
Schedule weekly team meetings. I recommend a 15- to 30-minute agenda focused on upcoming events, current needs and requests for help.
Cross train staff. It helps to shadow your staff and for your staff to shadow each other to gain a better understanding of everyone’s roles and challenges.
Discuss group challenges.
Listen, learn and take good notes.
DON’T correct or shame anyone in front of their peers. Always focus on the behavior you DO want.
Step 4: Get to know your staff
Schedule short, regular 1-on-1s
Meet where they work
Set an agenda
Ask questions, listen, learn and take notes
DON’T provide comments about their work performance for at least 3-6 months or until you have a better understanding of property systems, team dynamics and staff challenges (hold off until you have a replacement contractor or candidate at-the-ready who can step in if someone quits). Remember, your staff is anxious and on guard during your onboarding, waiting to see how your placement will change their day-to-day reality.
Step 5: Be the leader you wish you had
Support without judgment
Think of screw-ups as “procedural failures” or lack of training instead of personal insufficiencies.
Over communicate (at first) — let your staff get accustomed to your communication style, the depth of information you need and your sense of humor.
Get dirty — get in the trenches with your staff; pick up a rag, pick some weeds and do whatever it takes to earn staff’s respect and trust.
DON’T reprimand or have difficult conversations with anyone about anything via an email or text. Always face-to-face, always in private and ASAP whenever possible.
In closing…
Give yourself 3 to 9 months, depending on the number of staff and complexity of the property, before you implement any big changes. Get to know your staff, embrace why they are important (even if you’ve been asked to replace them) and learn what you can from them. Thank them for their service.
Have you experienced a situation like this? I’d love to hear your challenges and successes — and so would your fellow readers! I invite you to share your comments below.
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I hope this is helpful information. If there’s a way I can help you improve your performance and service, please reach out. I’d love to hear from you.
You’ve got this!
xo
Kelly
